Sunday, December 4, 2011

Zynga is all up in my Facebook!

I love playing games on Facebook.  I don't even use any of my other PC games anymore, because it's so much easier just to click on a Facebook link and start playing, disc-free.

I've had my farms, my zoo, my city, my frontier, my military operation, my puzzles, my islands and my games shows... but the same thing always ends up happening.  Zynga goes and gets all up in my Facebook!

Anyone who's ever played a Zynga game knows exactly what I'm talking about.  You get your plantation, city or kingdom pleasingly populated and decorated, and suddenly you find yourself  unable to progress any further because ten friends must send you twenty different meaningless items before you can move on.  I'm presently waiting on "mystery meat", "rusty keys" and "regal hoes" (no joke) before I can progress in the two games I'm currently obsessed with, Castleville and Adventure World.

There's nothing more annoying than a wall full of game requests.  But then, there's nothing more addicting than a new Facebook game, so we make that compromise.  It's a quick way to get unfriended and unneighbored too.  Believe me on that!

So, as I soon as I get so successful in a game that the only challenge remaining for me is to pester my friends on a thrice daily basis (or pay actual dollars for the convenience of bypassing the friend-nagging. Augh!), that usually becomes the indicator in which I block that game.  Such a waste!

If only the farms of my past were real.  I'd be a millionaire!  And, my zoo was so awesome that I recall obtaining even mythical and extinct creatures for my collection!  I almost feel so confident in these skills that I could see myself applying for a zoo director's position in the real world.  "What kind of experience do you have that would qualify you to take over as our struggling zoo's Chief Financial Officer?"  "Well, have you seen how many coins I've earned on Zooville?" [slides over paper with coinage penciled on it] "And, I'm pretty sure if you would add a Pegasus and some dodo birds to your collection, you'd start to see things turn around, for sure."  Their jaws would drop.  I'm positive.

But, all those skills gone to waste because a game, that should have remained between me and my PC, had to spread like the plague and effect everyone on my friends list.  Who knows what kind of Commander in Chief I could have become!  My success on Empires and Allies came to a screeching halt once I ran out of people to battle and materials that could only be provided by others.  And, I was thisclose to becoming the next Donald Trump.  If only, Cityville hadn't had a dozen neighbor-begging missions being demanded of me all at once.  I mean, my city had even begun to stretch across the river!  Do you know what it takes to build a bridge?!  But, oh well, I'm pretty sure that even The Donald refuses to have that much interaction with his neighbors.

Every few months another old game gets blocked, only to be replaced with a new game that's just been released.  It is fun to start again somewhere from scratch.  Once you've cleared so many trees and built up so many buildings in their place, success starts to get a little boring anyway and it just becomes time to start out on a new endeavor.

They say the average American will have seven career changes in their lifetime.  The average Zynga-player?  Probably thirty.

**Would this be a bad time to ask if anyone wants to be neighbors on Disney's Gnometown?  There's a woodland creature trapped in a locked box, and he can only be released with two neighbors' help!  Yes?  No?  It was worth a shot...** 


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