Sunday, March 17, 2013

Girl Talk: Brought to You by Little Boys


Today's kiddie conversation in the car turned romantic when the ten-year-old asked me this:

10YO: "Kimmy, can I ask you something?"

MY THOUGHT BUBBLE: "Uh oh..."

MY ACTUAL WORDS: "Of course."

10YO:  "Should I be mad at my best friend if he likes the same girl that I like?"

ME: "Well, if this girl is nice enough that you think she's great... chances are there will be other people in the world who think she's nice too. You can't expect to be her only friend."

10YO: "No, Kimmy.  I'm not talking 'friends'.  Pacifically..."

ME (a.k.a. Grammar Police, coming in quick with the cut-off): "...Pacifically's not a word. 'Specifically'..."

10YO:  "Specifically, what if he like-likes her too?"

ME: "Well, how about you all have fun together at recess? There's no reason you can't both think she's nice and all be friends. There's nothing wrong with that.  That's all you guys should be worrying about at ten years old."

He then launches into the whole story that his other friends think he should be mad at the best friend and think they should be fighting. This girl makes him laugh, this girl makes the friend laugh.  But, everyone else thinks the friend is trying to "steal" her from him.

ME (Now playing the role of 'GIRL POWER'): "Steal her?!  Girls aren't property and she doesn't belong to either of you!  You can all be friends and make each other laugh. You guys are ten-years-old!  It's not like anybody's getting married anytime soon!"

10YO:  "Married?!  You're thinking of like-like-like. I'm talking like-like, here..."

ME: "Oh brother!"

His verbal weighing of the right vs. wrong of the situation went on and on for a few more minutes that I, quite frankly, started to tune out of.

There was some more, "Everybody says this..." and "I think that..."  But, then he brought me back with the statement, "Well, I guess I wouldn't turn on my best friend. As a matter of fact, I'd DUMP a girl for my best friend!!!"

ME: "Now we're dumping people?!  I don't like that kind of talk!"

[Cue our little six-year-old punchline, chiming in from the back seat]:

6YO: "I dumped a girl once."

ME: "Oh, really..."

6YO:  "Yeah.  And, I mean I literally dumped her.  Right into the trash can!"

Let's check our Final Scorecard: 

10YO = +1 best friend, -1 girlfriend; 
6YO = +1 zinger; 
Me = Exasperated X 2.


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